Once Upon a Time I Got a Cat

This is Kali - She's pretty so I decided to let her live with me

I originally wanted to get a cat to be a spider killer for my apartment. But now that I have a cat, I just worry that she really will catch a spider, eat it, and die. As a responsible pet owner, I think that's an appropriate concern to have. Luckily, Kali has no desire to hunt spiders - But she did say that say that she wanted to be Spider Man for Halloween. I said no because Spider Man is for boys, so she decided that she's going to be a snail this year.

One of my favorite shows to watch on TV is the Dog Whisperer with Caesar Milan. I'm an animal whisperer too, which is why I was able to teach Kali how to cool things:

Play dead

Use the toilet

Look like an Asian with a Learning Disability

The thing I love most about Kali is that she scores me major points in the romance department: Guys love girls who love cats!

Ok so that's not true at all - But who cares

Once upon a time I was weird, and once upon a time I got a cat and became even more weird... So what

I Am The Funniest Person I Know

I decided to start a blog to keep track of a few of my favorite jokes
(all jokes qualify as my favorite jokes) and to
Maybe share a thought or two...or three or four...or thirty seven...with you.

And in all honesty - Everyone in the world has a hidden agenda.
So here are a few of the more realistic reasons for me to blog:

1. I can "talk" and have a whole conversation without anyone telling me that I am interrupting
(BTW: You are interrupting too when you interrupt me to tell me that I am interrupting you)

2. The following only skim the surface of upcoming blogging topics:
Justin Bieber The "Situation" and Snooki Club Hub Jello & Marshmallows Kali and the Dike Mobile
Stay tuned. Or don't. I'll laugh more than you anyways at what I have to say.

3. Two weeks from today will be my first day of my second attempt at college - I'm worried that I don't have enough excuses or distraction in place NOT to do my homework or go to class. Blogging is my backup plan to keep busy for when Facebook stalking gets old.


A daily goal of mine is to entertain myself - And luckily for me, I am a really good time.